


all light in the heavens

by ikuzonos



Category: Dangan Ronpa, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Christmas Fluff, F/M, NDRV3 Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-22
Updated: 2017-12-22
Packaged: 2019-02-18 07:40:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13095504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ikuzonos/pseuds/ikuzonos
Summary: [Major Endgame NDRV3 Spoilers]Saihara and Kaede spend their first Christmas together.





	all light in the heavens

**Author's Note:**

  * For [soniagiris](https://archiveofourown.org/users/soniagiris/gifts).



> Mild gore warning! It's not enough to warrant a 'graphic descriptions' tag, but it is present.

The other side of the bed is cold.

Saihara’s fingers stretch out under the down quilt, seeking out Kaede’s warmth, but they find only the soft sheets covering the mattress. He rolls over onto his back, eyes flickering open, to see hazy light streaming into the room, shining on the rose pink walls.

He can smell something emanating from the kitchen, soft and sharp all at once, like a splatter of fountain pen ink against fresh paper. Saihara props himself up on one elbow and rubs his eyes. The radiator in the corner of the bedroom is creaking and groaning.

He gets to his feet and floats into the kitchen, searching out the scent. Kaede is standing facing the stove, humming along to a song he recognizes the tune of.

“Good morning,” he says. His vision is still a little clouded from lack of sleep.

Kaede spins around, her hair smacking her mid back, “Shuuichi! I thought I was gonna have to wake you up, sleepyhead.”

Saihara smiles wearily, “Sorry. I think I was up for half the night.”

Her features soften, “Nightmare?”

“Maybe,” he admits, “I can’t remember it now… And I don’t really want to. Is that okay?”

“It’s more than okay!” Kaede promises, smiling at him with more intensity than the sun, “Don’t beat yourself up. Sit down, get some coffee! I’ll bring breakfast over in a minute.”

Saihara nods and sits down at the table. It’s right next to the window, and provides an ample view into the courtyard below, that is, when frost isn’t freezing the glass completely white.

He glances over his shoulder to examine their apartment, only to pause and cock his head. He can almost be certain that there had been a significant change since the previous night.

“K-Kaede?” Saihara asks, “Did you… decorate?”

Kaede giggles, “Oh, you noticed! Yeah, I really, really love Christmas, so I thought I’d put up some lights and a tree, even if today’s the Eve.”

Saihara says, “I’ve never celebrated Christmas before, but it all looks really nice. I’m sorry that I wasn’t awake to help you, though. It must have been a lot of work.”

She shrugs, “It wasn’t much trouble. And I got to see your reaction, so it was all worth it, really.”

Saihara closes his hand around the warm mug of coffee in front of him, “That’s very sweet of you to say.”

“It’s the truth!” she exclaims, “I’m super excited to enjoy this holidays with you and our friends. And I can’t wait to see what gifts everyone got for each other!”

His mouth dries up. He hasn’t bought her a present yet.

Kaede glances over her shoulder at him, “Are you excited too, Shuuichi? You look stressed out.”

Saihara shakes himself, “Of course I am! I just… have to pick up some of the gifts that I ordered. I hope that you don’t mind me running out on you.”

Kaede beams, “That’s not a problem. Come back soon, okay? I always get lonely when you’re not around.”

“I do too,” he admits, “I’ll try to make it a quick trip. That way we can still do some nice things together when I get home.”

“Alrighty! Have fun!” Kaede chirps.

Saihara takes his finished plate of eggs over to the sink and places them down on the stainless steel, then turns to her and kisses her on the cheek, “Take care.”

She takes his hand for a moment, looking up at him with glassy eyes, “You too.”

Saihara squeezes her hand, then leaves their shared apartment, heading for the department store a few blocks down. The walk is only a couple minutes, but in the biting cold air, time seems to pass much slower.

Once he’s inside the big building, it’s easy to navigate where he wants. There’s very few other customers around - probably spending time with their loved ones in lieu of shopping - which is good for keeping his anxiety at bay.

There’s a music store on the third floor. Saihara enters it, flocking to the shelves of piano books. He had considered buying her the newest installment of a game series she liked - one about courtrooms and pointing and truth - but decided against it. They’ve both had enough trials for a lifetime.

Besides, he can’t remember the name for the life of him.

Saihara selects a few difficult looking piano books and heads for the register. Tenko is standing behind it in her old aikidoka outfit, pinwheel and all. She regards him with a slightly confused smile.

“Hi, Saihara-san,” she says, “Didn’t realize that you still lived around here.”

Saihara pushes the books towards her, “Has it been that long since I came by? I’m sorry.”

Tenko scans the items, “Don’t stress about it. Just… missed seeing you every once in awhile. It’s not very much fun, working a dead end job like this one. Gets really lonely.”

“I’ll make sure to visit you more often,” Saihara promises, taking the books. Tenko had apparently wrapped them for him already, saving him time trying to find an open gift-wrap station, “Thank you, Chabashira-san. I’ll see you soon.”

Tenko flicks the Monodam bobblehead that sits next to her register, “Sure. Bye now, Saihara-san. Have a good holiday.”

“You too,” Saihara says, exiting the music store and breaking into a run. He just manages to slip onto the last train in time, standing upright in the metal cylinder mere moments before the doors close.

The ride lasts for several hours, but they pass in a blip. Saihara gets off as soon as he’s close to their apartment, waving at the taxi driver who brought him all the way there.

The moon shines down on his head as he weaves through the darkness. Ahead is their residence, and he dashed across their still green lawn to the front door. It opens with ease.

Kaede is hovering by their slow cooker, stirring something with a ladle. She looks up when she sees him and beams.

“Good to see that you’re home! I was wondering what was taking you so long,” she says.

Saihara stamps the snow off of his boots and hangs up his coat, “Sorry. It was a longer walk back than I expected.”

Kaede says, “It’s no trouble. Sit down, I made mulled wine for us!”

Saihara shuffles over to the table. It’s right next to the door, thankfully. Kaede drifts over a moment later with two steaming mugs and hands one to him.

They make small conversation between sips of the wine. Kaede seems to be enjoying it, but it merely tastes hot to him. Perhaps that’s part of the appeal. He decides.

“– said that they can’t make it to our gathering,” Kaede says, playing with her hair. It hardly brushes her shoulders anymore.

Saihara blinks, “Hm? Why can’t they make it?”

Kaede giggles, “Silly, they want to spend their first holidays as fiancés together. Remember, we got their wedding invitation?”

She points to a piece of paper on the table that he hadn’t noticed before. He reaches out to read it, but the printing on it is so messy that he can’t decipher it. It must be the three - four? No, three - cups of wine he had already drank. Even Kaede was a little blurry.

“Well, that’s too bad,” Saihara says eventually, “I was looking forward to seeing them.”

Kaede nods, “It is, but the others are still coming by tomorrow morning.”

Saihara nods and takes another sip, “I’m glad to hear that.”

Kaede taps her fingers on the table to the beat of a song. Suddenly, she says, “Hey, let’s open the gifts we got for each other! I know it’s the night before, but I’d feel weird about giving it to you in front of everyone.”

Saihara blinks, “Oh, sure. Should we go sit by the tree, then?”

“Sure!” Kaede chirps, jumping to her feet. Saihara pulls his wrapped presents out of the plastic bag and follows after her, sitting in front of the soft pine. On her way, she must have turned on some music, because English Christmas carols are floating through the apartment.

He hands over his gift first. Kaede tears into the paper and then gasps, “It’s just what I wanted! Thank you so much, Shuuichi! I can play so many new songs for you.”

“I can’t wait,” Saihara says, meaning it.

Kaede beams, “Okay, okay, my turn! Uh, I put it down… here!” She passes him a white box. It’s tied up with a pink ribbon, and feels surprisingly light. 

Saihara pulls open the lid, only to pause at the sight inside, “Kaede? It’s empty.”

“Oh!” she exclaims, “Aren’t I silly, I forgot to put it in! Well… I guess I’ll just give you my gift normally. Close your eyes, okay?”

Saihara complies.

Kaede says, “Hold out your hand.”

He does so, and she places something in his hand. It’s warm… and wet… and… pulsing? Saihara’s eyes flicker open to see that he’s holding a human heart in his palm.

Saihara’s gaze snaps up to meet Kaede’s. Her eyes hold the same vacant expression, completely devoid of any troubles. There’s a bloody hole in her chest.

“K-Kaede… what the  _hell_?” Saihara croaks, staring at the organ.

Something in Kaede’s voice fluctuates, like a lilo losing air, “What’s wrong? Don’t you like my present to you, Shuuichi? I got it just for you…”

He isn’t sure if it’s his own heart or the one in his hand, but he feels a beat coursing through his entire body, choking him.

Kaede smiles, sickly sweet, and moves his other hand on top of the warm heart, “I think that you just need to give my gift a chance.”

Saihara whispers, “Why are you…”

Kaede moves his arms him to his face, “Why don’t you… have a taste?”

“No!” Saihara yells, moving his head backwards. He looks over his shoulder but there’s nowhere to hide.

Kaede moves his arms with more force, her smile gaining daggers. She thrusts her heart up to his face and Saihara struggles but she’s stronger than him, she always was.

The Flea Waltz screams into his ears as she forces the organ up, up,  _up_  until it brushes his lips-

  
  


  
Saihara awakens in a cold sweat.

He’s in his bedroom with the olive green wallpaper, right where he should be. No fancy bed, no seasonal decorations, just a very large futon, and the two people who live with him.

He traces the lining of his quilt with his finger, trying to latch onto the sensation. Already the dream, or perhaps the nightmare, is fading.

Beside him, Himiko stirs, “Nyeh? Saihara, what are you doing? It’s… it’s fuck o’clock in the morning.”

Saihara freezes, realizing that his breathing is loud enough that she must be able to hear it. He mumbles, “U-Um… I… Sorry.”

Himiko looks up at him with sympathetic eyes, “Oh, I see. Was it a good dream? Or a nightmare?”

Saihara moves his lips soundlessly before croaking, “I… don’t know.”

Himiko says, “I’ll make you some hot chocolate. You try and sort yourself out.”

She rolls off of the futon and walks out of their bedroom. Shortly after, there’s a series of clanking noises. Saihara pulls the quilt tighter around his shoulders.

On the far side of the futon, Maki wearily raises her head and grumbles, “Which one of you…”

“Y-Yumeno-san is in the kitchen,” Saihara breaths, trying to steady himself.

Maki squints at him, “What happened? You look like shit.”

Saihara hunches over. He can feel a heartbeat inside him, but whether it’s his own, or a remnant of the dream, he isn’t sure.

Maki raises an eyebrow, “What kind of dream was it? Her execution?”

He flinches on instinct, “N-No. I… I probably could have… handled that.”

Maki scoots closer, “You don’t have to tell us. But if it would make you feel better, we’re here to listen.”

“Harumaki?” Himiko pokes her head through the door, “I didn’t know you woke up too. Did you also…”

Maki shakes her head, “I heard the noise. What’s that you’ve got there?”

Himiko scurries in, “Hot chocolate. Figured it would help calm Saihara down. You doing any better?”

He shrugs, “Uh… Maybe. It doesn’t hurt as much?”

“That’s good,” Himiko says, setting down a tray of mugs on the floor. She crawls onto the futon and worms her way under the blanket, nestling right between the two of them.

Saihara takes one of the mugs - the one with the alpaca decal on it - and takes a sip. It’s hot, like the wine from the dream, but he can actually taste the flavours. 

The other two take the remaining mugs, curling closer together so they can all share body heat.

After a moment, Saihara mumbles, “We were spending the holidays together. And she gave me a gift.”

“That sounds nice,” Himiko says softly, “What did she give you?”

“Her heart. Literally,” he adds, when she gives him a confused expression, “She… ripped it out of her chest… and she… she m-made me…”

Maki breaks in, “Don’t continue, if it’s going to fuck you up. I get the picture.”

Himiko says, “I’m so sorry. Are you gonna be okay?”

“I… I don’t know,” he whispers, sucking back more hot chocolate.

Maki says, “It’s fine if you aren’t. I know I’ll never be ‘okay.’ Trauma doesn’t just vanish with passing time, and what happened fucked with you… so you don’t have to try and fix yourself. Especially when you’re not broken.”

Saihara looks at her for a moment, “T-Thanks, Harukawa-san. That means a lot.”

Maki looks down at her mug, “Don’t mention it.”

They continue to drink until their mugs run empty. Once they’ve all finished, Himiko sets their mugs back on the tray.

“I’m… going to try and go back to sleep now,” Saihara says softly.

Himiko asks, “Will you be okay?”

He shrugs, “I’ll find out, I guess. Thank you, both of you.”

Saihara lies down before either of them can make a bigger protest.

  
  
  


His eyes flicker open to the apartment with rose pink walls and smooth floorboards. Saihara turns his head to see that Kaede is sitting on his left, looking at him almost expectantly.

“Sorry,” he says, taking her hand.

“No, I shouldn’t have scared you the way I did,” Kaede says. There’s a large bandage on her chest.

Saihara takes her hand. Quietly, he says, “I still love you. Is that a bad thing?”

Kaede shrugs, “I don’t think so. But I’m biased, of course. I still love you too.”

Saihara cups her cheek with his hand and leans in, kissing her with the intensity of a choir of furies. He feels her smile at him, before she kisses him back.

Saihara finds himself not wanting to wake up again, and the blood in his mouth only serves to make the moment sweeter. 


End file.
